I have lots of inquiries from well-meaning individuals who want to know where the line is as it relates to infidelity. Some wonder if the adage “you can look but don’t touch” counts as infidelity. Most people would agree (minus Bill Clinton) that any sort of sexual contact is considered infidelity. I prefer the use the following definition that was given by a religious leader by the name of Gene R. Cook. He said, “You are not to turn on or be turned on by anyone that is not your spouse.”
This definition requires the listener to consider how their actions, thoughts and feelings are affecting them and those around them. I believe we could all use a little more self and other-awareness. I like that his definition refutes the “look but don’t touch” belief. Additionally, it keeps sexual energy where it belongs – in the stability and safety of a marriage relationship.
What do you think of his definition?