Just finished reading this great commentary from Bob Greene on CNN.com on the need to slow down and connect in real-time. Individuals who struggle with pornography addiction and their partners often feel disconnected from the people who matter most to them. Their lives feel unorganized and chaotic. This is in large part to the disconnected experience that comes from shame. Shame makes us feel like we’re outside of ourselves. Whether it’s the shame of violating your own standards or the shame of feeling rejected and unloved because of someone’s choices, the disconnection still impacts the way life feels.
A major recovery task is to slow down and notice what’s around you. Unplug, turn off the phone, spend time doing nothing with those you love.
My wife recently started sitting outside at dusk to feel connected and recharged. She stops working around the house with the kids and goes outside to sit in a patio chair in front of our house. We’ve started following her out there to sit and enjoy the waning sunshine. It’s a warm, calm, and peaceful moment that lasts only about 20 minutes. It’s made a huge difference in the pace and energy of our evenings.
I’ve challenged many of my clients to start slowing down more and experience life without pressures and schedules. What can you slow down right now?